Jess' Dress Mess

A painter named Jess made a mess,
She spilled some paint onto her dress,
The children all stared,
But then they got scared,
So they all went home to play chess.

Martian Monroe

There was a green UFO,
Thirty feet wide or so.
A martian came out,
And without a doubt,
It had to be Marilyn Monroe.

Fly By

A small bird was flying too high,
The other birds all wondered why,
It's so high overhead,
It must surely be dead,
So the largest bird let out a sigh.

Pete's Stinkin' Feet

Pete had some stinky feet,
They reeked of rotten meat.
He took off his shoes,
And sipped on some booze,
And passed out right on the street.

The God Of Limericks Triumphant Return

The limerick well had gone dry,
Which encited a worldwide sigh.
But may all of ye hear,
There is no need to fear,
For The God Of Limericks is nigh.

A Bizarre Car By Far

Phil Jones drove a car made of glass,
But the seats were made out of brass,
So when he drove by,
People would cry,
Phil Jones must be very high class.

Dancing Bugs Me

A tall man was wearing green pants,
That were totally covered with ants.
He stopped by a tree,
And said "Look at me!",
As he did a hilarious dance.

A Toad's Trash

I saw a thing on the road,
From my humble abode.
There was no mystery,
As to it's history,
It was left there by a toad.

Ancient Artist

There was an old woman from France,
Who painted designs on her pants,
But when she went out,
And wandered about,
No one ever gave them a glance.

The Price of Cole

Cole was a curious mole,
Who lived inside of a hole,
Until Mr. McGrew,
Payed a buck fifty two,
To purchase the home of young Cole.

The Flame Blame Game

A sparrow flew out of a tree,
And went flying out over the sea,
But when it returned,
The tree had been burned,
But I swear it was not burned by me.

Unlucky Ducky

Ronald was an old duck,
Who had clearly run out of luck.
He was stuck in the rain,
And was hit by a train,
And then by a pickup truck.

Bad Mouse Bandit

A mouse snuck into a store.
He had never been there before.
And when he ran out,
There was no doubt,
He'd stolen two dollars or more.

Bob's Cruel Death

Bob was an utter tool,
A completely useless fool.
Then one day he died,
And no one cried,
Which his mother thought was quite cruel.

A Mean Monkey

A monkey was not being nice,
He was throwing around lumps of rice.
I did not know it,
And then I got hit,
Then the monkey tried to hit me twice.